The Best Questions to Ask Your Family Before Their Stories Are Lost

A few years ago, I started thinking about how many stories exist inside our own families that we simply never hear.

What was Grandpa like as a kid?

What was Mom’s first job?

What did Grandma do for fun before smartphones existed?

What was Dad’s most embarrassing moment?

What family traditions did they grow up with?

The problem isn't that our parents and grandparents don't have interesting stories. Most of us just don't think to ask the questions.

That's the idea behind my ASK family activity book series: Ask Grandpa, Ask Grandma, Ask Mom, Ask Dad, Ask Auntie, and Ask Uncle.

They're simple books designed to do one thing:

Get families talking.

What Are the ASK Family Books?

Each book contains questions designed to help children, teens, and adults interview someone they love and learn more about their life.

For example, Ask Grandpa: 50 Questions to Ask Grandpa About His Life includes questions about childhood, jobs, favorite trips, technology, hobbies, accomplishments, and family memories. There are 50 main questions plus 50 shorter bonus questions.

The goal isn't to make it feel like an interview for a school assignment.

It's a conversation starter.

You might ask one question and spend the next 20 minutes hearing a story you've never heard before.

And that's the point.

A Meaningful Gift for Grandparents, Parents, Aunts and Uncles

One reason I love these books is that they're an activity and a gift.

You can give Ask Grandma: 50 Questions to Ask Grandma About Her Life to Grandma—but then sit down and go through it with her.

That's a very different experience from simply giving someone another object.

The ASK books work especially well for:

• Mother's Day and Father's Day
• Grandparents Day
• Birthdays
• Christmas
• Family reunions
• Retirement celebrations
• Family history projects
• Or simply a Sunday afternoon with family

They can also be a fun activity when grandparents are visiting or when kids need something meaningful to do at a family reunion.

Why Asking Family Questions Matters

One of the things I've realized as I've gotten older is that family stories can disappear surprisingly quickly.

Grandparents pass away. People move. Memories fade. We assume we'll eventually ask about something...

and then we don't.

That's why I like questions that go beyond names and dates.

What jobs did you have?

What was school like?

Where did you go on vacation?

What did you get in trouble for?

What technology amazed you when it first appeared?

Those answers tell us something about the person.

And often, one question leads somewhere completely unexpected.

You may discover a hilarious childhood disaster, an old family tradition, an unusual job, a difficult experience someone overcame, or a story that makes everyone at the table say:

“Wait...you did WHAT?”

Those are usually the best ones.

What Are Good Questions to Ask Your Grandparents About Their Lives?

If you're wondering how to learn more about your grandparents or parents, don't worry about asking profound questions every time.

Start simple.

Ask about childhood. School. Friends. First jobs. Vacations. Holidays. Favorite foods. Music. Dating. Hobbies. Mistakes. Accomplishments.

Then listen.

The follow-up questions are often where the really interesting stories appear.

That's ultimately why I created the ASK series.

Ask Grandpa. Ask Grandma. Ask Mom. Ask Dad. Ask Auntie. Ask Uncle.

Because everyone in your family has stories you've never heard.

And someday, those stories may become some of the most valuable things they leave behind.

So ask the questions while you can.

You might be surprised by the answers.